Using HUMOR to Fight The Stigma

Michele and I are fighting the stigma of mental illness the only way that actually works: with humor.

A career in late-night comedy writing (22 years helping write Jay Leno's Tonight Show monologue) has taught me one thing above all else: Comedy breaks the ice.

Humor allows you to discuss ANY topic. And, that's important, because you can't solve a problem if you can't talk about it. And, if you can't joke about something, well, then, you're probably afraid to talk about it. That's called shame. And, shame gets in the way of everything good.

"Bug Therapy" is about a mosquito who faints at the sight of blood.

The other bugs include, Dr. Phil McGraw as a Pill Bug therapist. Meghan Trainor as Citronella. Jay Leno as the OCD Fly, who can’t stop washing his hands. Sterling K. Brown as a depressed Stick Bug, who feels like no one sees him. Tom Green as a coffee-addicted Grasshopper. He loves it, but it makes him jumpy. Michele & I play the dysfunctional, co-dependent Dragonfly Couple, she's literally on top of him. There's also a Praying Mantis who doesn't pray, because she thinks she is god. A Spider who's afraid of Spiders. And a Leafbug who suffers from anxiety - he's afraid of autumn, when all the leaves die!

The bugs in BUG THERAPY are funny. They initially fear being laughed at, but when they do actually laugh at each other -- it doesn't kill them! And, it bonds them together. And, on this point, Michele and I do not spare ourselves.

In addition to showing our film, we share our deeply personal, and liberating (formerly "embarrassing") story of our 27-year-old son Max's mental-health breakdown, psych-wards, and ongoing recovery (fingers crossed). The story is both a terrifying -- and funny. Yes. There are funny moments, and that is so freeing!

The Importance Of Therapy

Most people fear therapy. (Maybe they should talk to someone about that!)

I used to be afraid of therapy. As a man, I incorrectly saw therapy as a sign of weakness. A sign that I wasn't mentally tough enough to endure. Or, how about this: a sign that I had no real friends to talk to. "Shame", anyone?

But, if you've had the good fortune to go to therapy, and had a good therapist, you realize: They don't tell you what to do. They're reluctant to even give advice! What a good therapist does, is listen. And, help YOU hear what YOU'RE saying. They basically hold a mirror up to you, and ask you if what you're hearing makes sense to you.

Dr. Phil (I'm a fan) will often listen intently to someone's long, detailed, self-analysis and strategy. And, then, he asks one question: "How's that working for you?" Patients sometimes burst into tears, and admit, "It's not! It's not working!" Now, they're ready to try something new. And, it was "their idea" to do so. :)

Everyone would benefit from therapy. If you think rich successful people have it made, guess again. Like the message of our film states: Everyone struggles with something. And, there's no shame in asking for help.

Michele and I have been together 13 years. We're both in therapy. If I was single, and dating today, I would insist the other person be in therapy!

Resiliency and Self-Transformation

We've all know someone who's a MESS. Who's made bad choice after bad choice. Always seems to be in a hole, and just digging themselves in deeper. Why do some people come out of that, while others never seem to get their life together?

I (Michele) was one of those "messes". Kicked out at 17, homeless, on drugs, in abusive relationships.Throw in a modeling gig in NYC, and marrying into a cult? What could go wrong there? It is a miracle I'm not dead, or in jail right now. How did I dig myself out of that? How did I overcome?

In therapy terms, it's called "Doing the work". Working on myself. Accepting that I alone had put myself in that hole, and I alone, and with a little help, could get myself out.